


Say Anything

by Strawberry_Times



Category: The Book of Mormon - Parker/Stone/Lopez
Genre: 1980's, 80's AU, Arnold and Naba r the best, Connor is smart and shy, Homophobia, Kevin is happy but lonely, M/M, Say Anything is my favorite (non-animated) movie and I wanted to do a Connor/Kevin version of it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-28
Updated: 2017-10-28
Packaged: 2019-01-25 17:08:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12536868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Strawberry_Times/pseuds/Strawberry_Times
Summary: Connor McKinley, the graduated valadictorian and scholarship-winning 19 year old and Kevin Price, the oh-so-in love average joe who would do anything to spend some time with Connor, spend the summer together.Takes place in the 1980's.





	Say Anything

Kevin threw his gown on and flung his cap in the car as he drove to his graduation ceremony. He blasted music and sang along cooly as he drove down the lane. 

Today was his day. 

His radio skipped and he took out the cassette tape and blew on it, putting it back in. The song played. He smiled and continued to sing, letting his arm rest out the window since the AC in his car didn't work, but he didn't really care about that.

-

Connor was dressed in his cap and gown neatly, and riding passenger in his dads car. He was so nervous he thought he was going to throw up. His dad kept dribbling on and on about how proud he was of him and how this is just the first step to his big bright future. 

"Let me hear your speech!" His Dad exclaimed, tapping his fingers along to a song on the radio. Connor laughed nervously. 

"Ok..." he said, and pulled out some papers he was keeping on the floor by his feet. He laughed when his dad sang along happily and loudly to the song. He recited his valedictorian speech, and his dad laughed at the poorly written joke he ended it with. It made Connor feel a lot less nervous. 

"That was wonderful!" He said. Connor smiled, but then frowned sadly.

"It's just... I feel like none of these kids know me?" He said. 

"What!?" His Dad exclaimed. "How?" 

"Well I mean c'mon Dad it's not like I'm the most popular guy there... I don't think they really like me that much." He said. His dad parked outside the building. He turned to him.

"Listen to me Connor." Connor looked at him, and almost laughed at how determined he was. "When you get up there and give that speech, those kids are gonna go crazy for you! You're Connor McKinley for Christ sake! You have worked so hard your whole life and it's finally a starting to pay off." Connor looked down to his lap and played with the edge of one of his papers. His father lifted his chin. "Hey, don't throw it all over just because of some last minute doubt... You will be wonderful. Gimme a smile." Connor laughed. 

"Dad stop-"

"No, c'mon smile for me." He said. Connor gave him a snarky look, and then flashed his best smile. His dad laughed. "That's my boy." 

-

Kevin had just graduated. He was sitting in the bleachers with his friends, smiling to no extent. They watched as a boy named Thomas, who the teachers called Pop tarts because he always seemed to be sneaking them into class, sang a song badly without any music. It was so funny that Arnold practically fell out of his seat laughing. When he was done, the entire senior class stood to their feet and cheered for him, he smiled and threw his fist in the air. They all took their seats again. 

"Now, I would like to introduce you all to someone who is destined to be one of the brightest minds of our generation-" 

"Here he comes." Kevin said, sitting a little straighter in his seat. Nabalungi rolled her eyes next to him. 

"-He is a hard working, important student here at Lockwood High, and we are so sad to see him go, but incredibly hopeful for his future. Now, your valedictorian, Connor McKinley!"

Connor McKinley was the most beautiful boy Kevin had ever laid his eyes on. He was lean and tall and his hair was always cut just right. He had these eyes that Kevin swears if he ever looked at for too long, he would melt. Kevin clapped so hard and screamed so loud for Connor he thought he was going to ruin his voice. Connor took the stage.

"Hi." He said awkwardly into the microphone. 

Kevin leaned over to Arnold. "Those eyes." He said in awe. Arnold shushed him.

Connor gave his speech and no one really showed much interest in it, but Kevin couldn't get enough. His voice was soft and he looked nervous, but Kevin thought he was doing amazing up there. When the speech was over Kevin shouted and yelled and stood to his feet. Arnold and Naba were embarrassed by him, and pretended they didn't know who he was. 

After the ceremony had ended Naba and Arnold were taking pictures with their families, and Kevin watched Connor from far away. He went up and pulled Naba aside. 

"Take my picture with him." He said.

"No Kevin that's so creepy." She said. He shook her shoulder.

"C'mon! It'll be quick I swear!" She groaned and got her camera ready. As Connor was Talking to his dad and turned to point at something Kevin stood next to him briefly, and Naba snapped the picture. He ran away from Connor semi-hoping he didn't see what just happened. Naba punched him hard in the arm.

"I hate you for making me do dumb shit." She said, he kissed her cheek. 

"Thank you!" 

~

Connor thought his speech went well. People clapped and the retirees from his Dad's home were all there taking lots of pictures, so it couldn't have been that bad. After the ceremony he stood out near the trees where everyone had congregated, and he snapped some pictures with his dad. 

"I have a surprise for you." His dad said. He had a mischievous look on his face and Connor didn't trust it one bit.

"What?" He said suspiciously. His dad pulled a set of keys from his pocket and handed them to Connor. Connor looked a little confused, so his dad pointed behind him. Connor turned around and saw a dark pink car. He pointed to it in awe.

"You got me that!" He turned quickly and hugged his dad, who was laughing heartily.

When they arrived home, Connor excitedly ran into the house.

"You have to teach me to drive shift this weekend!" He said. His dad laughed and agreed. Connor was about to go upstairs to change when his dad stopped him.

"Hold on a second, there's one more thing." Connor turned around and walked to him. "Now, since I'm not only your dad, I'm also your friend, I got you this." He handed him a small box. 

"Dad, you didn't have to get me another gift, I don't know any kid who's parents got them a car!" He said. 

"Just open it!" His dad said with a laugh. Connor gave him a look and took the box. Inside was a Rolex watch, gold with silver lining. He stared at it with wide eyes. His dad chuckled at his reaction. 

"Dad what?" He said in awe, examining the watch.

"Do you like it?!" He said. 

"It's beautiful but..." 

"What?" 

"Dad, it's so expensive..." he was a little worried about the price. His dad scoffed.

"Nonsense. You deserve it for all the hard work you do." He hugged him, and Connor held him back a little tighter than usual.

"Thanks dad."

-

Kevin walked up to his apartment door and opened it. He made a dash for the small kitchen and started making a sandwich with bread, chips, pickles and mustard. His older sister, Joan, came out holding a basket of laundry. She noticed him and put the basket down, giving him a big hug. Joan was 22 and already looked like a house wife. She had curly brown hair and was very skinny, she wore dresses and always wore the ring her ex-fiancé gave her.

"I'm so sorry I couldn't be there bud, Jamie got sick and I had to pick him up from school. Your big day and no one was there to see it." She leaned against the counter. He heard a small cough and noticed Jamie, his five year old nephew, sitting on the couch.

"It's totally ok I didn't even think about it." He took a bite of his sand which. "Not feelin' good Jay-man?" He said with a mouth full of food. Jamie croaked a little no. Joan scoffed.

"Why do you eat that stuff? There's no food in your food?" Kevin smiled and took another bite. She made an exasperated sigh and cleaned up some of his ingredients. "Mom and dad called from Germany, they said congrats." 

"That's cool." He looked over to Jamie who had made his way over to them. "Feeling better Jay-man?" 

"Ya" he said weakly.

"Your voice isn't at full YA strength huh?" He leaned down. Jamie screamed "YA" and Kevin laughed and gave him a fist bump. Joan scoffed.

"Why do you do that! You get him so excited and you know he's sick!" Kevin looked to her, all fun left his face. He stood up and sighed with crossed arms. 

"What's wrong with you?" He said. "You used to be so fun? Just get in a good mood, how hard is it to decide to be in a good mood then just be in one?" 

"Gee, it's easy." She said sarcastically.

"Listen, I'm sorry that-" he looked at Jamie. "T-I-M left you... But I am not T-I-M!" Kevin looked away from her. He remembers Tim walking out on them. It was silent.

"... I was pretty fun wasn't I?" She asked with a small smile. Kevin smiled.

"The best." 

"I still am..." she said. Jamie coughed and Joan went to him.

~

Kevin went over to Arnold's house a lot with Naba. They sat in Arnold's room, and Naba played her guitar and they chilled. Kevin was pacing around. 

"What's up with you?" Naba said. Kevin looked to her.

"I think I'm gonna ask Connor McKinley to Chris's party." Kevin said, determined. Arnold and Naba shared a look.

"Kev you're not being very indiscreet about this you know." Arnold said, putting down his comic book, Naba nodded. "Someone's gonna like... Figure it out, if you aren't careful." 

"Agreed." She said.

"Ok but guys.. I think he might like me too?" Kevin said. Both of them looked shocked. 

"What! How?" Naba said. 

"Well we went on a little date a few weeks ago." Kevin said crossing his arms.

"Are you talking about the mall? Kevin. C'mon. You sat next to him on a bench and only talked to him when you apologized for accidentally bumping into his shoulder. That's not a date." Arnold said. Naba laughed.

"If that's not a date then I don't know what is!" Kevin pouted.

"A date is... A pre-arranged plan, with the intention of love." Naba said with a sweet smile, grabbing Arnold's hand. They kissed and Kevin groaned.

"You guys make me wanna throw up." He said. 

"You're only saying that because you want what we have." Naba said, playing a few strings on her guitar. Arnold nodded.

"Whatever. I'm gonna ask him tonight when I get home. I found his number in the telephone book last week. It's not gonna be weird, and we're gonna have a great time." Kevin said.

Arnold looked sadly to him. "But Kev... What if he's not in to you?" Kevin paused. "I mean, how would you even figure that out? It's not like you can just ask him if he's in to guys?" Kevin was silent, and couldn't think of a good response. He didn't really like to think about that scenario. Naba decided to lift the mood.

"Y'know what? I say go for it. We're not in school anymore anyway, so who's gonna blab on you." They all shared a look, and Kevin smiled.

~

Kevin went to the small bathroom, where he kept one of the house telephones. He locked the door and dialed a number. The phone rang and Kevin almost lost his nerves until he heard a voice.

"Hello?" An older man asked.

"Uh yes, is uh, Connor there?" He asked. 

"Is this the boy from his study group?" 

"Uh, no sir we don't really know each other but um, I was going to ask if he wanted to hang out with me sometime soon..." Kevin decided that sounded a little creepy. "We go to school together." 

"Well, I'll pass along the message." He said.

"Thank you! My name is Kevin by the way. Thank you again." He said and the line went dead. His hands were shaking slightly, and he put the phone away. 

~ 

Jim put the phone down. He went back to reading his paper, and it rang again. He picked it up.

"Hello is this Connor James McKinley?" The man on the other end said.

"No this is his father, but I can take-" he reached for his notepad.

"Mr. McKinley your son has been awarded the Wreath scholarship, and will be receiving a full ride to our Institute in England." The man said.

"What!?" He yelled. 

Jim drove excitedly to the nursing home, a place he has worked for twenty years taking care of old people. Connor was in the kitchen washing dishes with another worker. "Will you give us a minute please." 

She left the room, and Connor looked frightened. "What's going on?" He asked, setting a plate aside. Jim closed all the doors, which only made Connor more anxious, and looked him straight in the eye. 

"I just got a phone call." Connor made a sad noise.

"Oh please don't tell me. Is it bad news?" He asked. Jim grabbed his shoulders. 

"You won." He said. Connor's eyes went huge and his mouth dropped.

"What?" He asked quietly. 

"The hardest scholarship to win in the whole country and you won." Connor leaned back against the counter. "Now young man, I want you to stand up tall, and tell yourself you are special." Connor sank to the floor.

He looked up to him practically with tears in his eyes. "I have to get on a plane..." he said hopelessly. Jim leaned down next to him.

"Connor. That doesn't matter. Listen to me." Connor looked at him. He had his mothers pale blue eyes. "You were born in a group of thousands of people, and one by one they dropped like flies, until you were all that's left, and now! Now everyone will finally know how wonderful you are!" Connor was bright red. 

"Stop it stop it stop it!" He said with a small smile, hiding his face in his hands. His dad moved his hands away and hugged him, they both laughed until they cried tears of joy.

~

Connor sat on his bed going through his phone messages that his dad left for him. One read "Kevin from school", Connor didn't know any Kevin from school. He dialed the number.

~

Kevin's house phones rang in the bathroom and in the living room. He and his sister shared a look, and she bolted for the bathroom, he tried to beat her there but he was too late. 

"Tooooo bad." She sang. He kicked the ground slightly freaking out. He picked up the other phone near the couch and held it to his chest. He turned to Jamie who was standing against the wall. 

"Not a word." He whispered. Jamie nodded and zipped his mouth.

~

"Hello?" Connor heard on the other line. His voice was deep.

"Hi, is this Kevin?" Connor asked. He heard a nervous laugh on the other end and smiled. 

"Haha, uh ya! Kevin Price. This is Connor right?"

"Yes."

"Cool cool... Cool cool cool so! I know we don't really uh.. Know each other very well, but I was wondering if you wanted to go with me tomorrow night to this party?" Connors eyebrows raised. Some kid he barely knew was inviting him to a party. 

"Uh... Who's party?" He found himself asking. 

"Oh! It's this guy I know he throws huge parties every year for the senior class. His name is Chris?" Connor didn't respond. "Chris Church?" Still not ringing any bells. "Well, anyways, I figure I never see you at any parties and I would love to hang out with you if you wanted to come?" He sounded very nervous.

"I'm busy." Connor said. He heard a sigh.

"Like.. Monumentally busy?" This guy would not give up. But Connor had to admit it was pretty intriguing. 

"Well... Not monumentally.." he said, playing with the telephone wire.

"Then come with me! If you hate it I promise I'll take you home no questions asked!" Connor thought about it.

"Ok. Yeah." He said. He found himself smiling into the phone and he wasn't really sure why.

"Yeah? Yes! Yes yes this is great! You're great and this is great! Ok... I'll pick you up at eight tomorrow ok?" Kevin said.

"Ok." Connor laughed. "Bye Kevin." 

"Bye Connor." Connor hung up the phone. He sat on his bed and covered himself in the big blanket. He felt warm inside.

~

Kevin pulled up outside Connor's house. He felt a little intimidated because of just how big it was, but he still mustered up the courage to get out of his car and knock on the front door. 

Connor's father was a normal height, fair haired, mannered man. Kevin stuck out his hand which was shaken with a warm smile. Kevin awkwardly joked that he would take care of his son and bring him home in one piece. His dad kind of laughed and there was an awkward air between them. Kevin shoved his hands in his jean pockets.

Connor appeared a moment later from behind a doorway. He was wearing a white suit without the jacket. Kevin had to make sure he wasn't ogling at him, but he couldn't really help the small smile that donned his face. His shirt fit him just right and make his thin frame seem fuller, and his hair was swept back, and Kevin wanted to take a picture just to remember this moment. He had a little pink flower attached to the pocket of his shirt, and he kept fiddling with it to seem less nervous. 

"Hi." Kevin said. Connor looked at him, a small blush creeping up on his cheek.

"Hi." They shared eye contact for just a moment to long and his father gave Kevin a strange look. Connor snapped out of it and kissed his dad on the cheek. "I'll call you later to check in ok?" He said. His dad smiled.

"That's fine, have a good time." Connor walked to meet Kevin at the front door. He smelt divine.

"Goodbye sir!" He said, and led Connor to his car. Kevin was trying to hide his smile but it wasn't really working. He opened the door for Connor, who gave him a shy "thanks". Kevin ran around and got in the drivers seat. 

As Kevin was starting the engine, Connor picked up a box he found on the floor of the car. 

"German pretzels?" He said with the hint of a laugh. 

"Ha, ya my parents sent them to me. You want one?" He asked.

"No thank you." He said politely and placed the box back on the floor. They sat in silence for a few minutes. "Would it be horrible if I wanted to go home early?" Connor asked nervously, turning to Kevin.

Kevin was a bit surprised. "Oh? No of course not." 

"Thanks..." he said. The rest of the drive was spent with idle chatter and Kevin just had to ask if Connor was single. He needed to know.

"So uh, are you..." he needed to sound nonchalant. "Dating anyone?" Connor laughed loudly which made Kevin smile.

"Oh no! Nope! No girlfriends for me!" He said. Kevin laughed but he wondered what Connor meant by that. 

"Why not?" He asked. Connor's laughed subsided and he gave Kevin a surprised look. He kinda smiled shyly and shrugged his shoulders. Kevin could tell he was at a loss for words.

"I don't know?... I guess uh, I guess I've never really been that interested." Kevin's eyes went wide. Connor saw his face then quickly added, "In dating! I've never been interested in dating!" He was beet red. Kevin laughed.

"Why not?" He asked. Connor messed with the flower.

"I don't know... I don't think anybody has really ever been interested in me?" Kevin wanted so bad to tell him how wrong he was. "Plus... I don't know I'm not really a, relationship kinda guy? I don't see the appeal in having to pay for everything a girl wants just 'cuz you're a guy?" Kevin laughed.

"Ya I suppose that's true." He said. It was comfortably silent for a while.

"So... Are you dating anyone?" Connor asked. Kevin looked over to him with a smile. 

"Nope!" He said. "Me and women never really got along." Connor laughed loudly from the other seat. "What! It's true!" They both laughed and Connor grabbed Kevin's shoulder for support. Kevin tried his best to hide how much he wanted to hold his hand right then and he blushed. 

"That's honestly pretty surprising." Connor said. 

"Really?" Kevin asked with a smile.

"Ya! I mean, look at you you're a handsome guy!" Connor said. Kevin felt a little hot. "You're also really nice and I don't know? I just thought you might be in a relationship." 

In a moment of bravery Kevin said, "Well I want to be." Connor chuckled.

"Who with?" He asked. Kevin scrambled.

"Not telling." Was the best response he could muster. Connor hit his shoulder.

"Ah, c'mon! Who am I gonna tell?" He said with a smile. Kevin pulled into Chris's big yard where tons of cars were already parked. He turned to Connor and immediately regretted it because he looked so handsome that Kevin wanted to kiss him.

"I like someone who I don't really know. But they're at this party tonight so I'm hoping we can get closer." Kevin said. Connor looked toward the house.

"She's here?" He said excitedly. Kevin shrugged with a smile. 

"Well, if you find her, you have to introduce me." They walked out of the car and up to the party. 

~

Connor was a little bit shaken as he walked into this party. It was loud and people were fast paced and not afraid. He was severely over dressed he realized, as he looked around and saw casual outfits and the occasional dress on some girls. He looked to Kevin, who gave him a smile. He thinks the girl he likes would be really lucky to have him, even if she doesn't know him that well. 

A man came up to Kevin and handed him a bag of keys.

"You're the key master tonight dude!" He said. Kevin groaned. 

"Key master?" Connor asked. 

"It basically means I have to hold this bag and collect everyone's keys, and then judge if they're too drunk to drive home at the end of the night." Some people dropped their keys into the bag, and the other man laughed.

"Oh, so it's an honor?" Connor said. Kevin shook his head.

"Not really." He said. "Connor, this is Chris Church, the guy who throws these parties." Kevin said. Connor shook his hand. He was a shorter guy, with blonde hair and he was wearing sunglasses. He didn't look much older than himself, and Connor wondered if he went to school with him. 

"Nice to meet you young man!" Chris said. "Now if you excuse me, I have to attend to drunk teenagers." He said and walked away. Connor turned to Kevin.

"How old is he?" He asked. Kevin smiled, and more people dropped their keys in his bag.

"He's 22. Graduated a few years back and throws these parties for each senior class. You're gonna love it, at the end of the night he dresses up like a chicken and pretends to be a piñata." Connor laughed. He realized he had slowly drifted closer to Kevin and was latched to one of his arms as they looked on at the party. He quickly let go, and made up some excuse to go off on his own. 

Kevin was taller than him, and fit, and Connor had a strangle fondness of him that he didn't quite understand, or maybe didn't want to...

He walked through the house and got strange looks from people he didn't really know. He walked out to the back patio where people were drinking and dancing. Some girl from school, Connor thinks her name was Kimbe, came up to him. She was big and beautiful and she was salutatorian, right behind Connor. 

"Hi!" She said in a peppy voice. Connor smiled at her. "Oh my gosh I'm so glad you came tonight!" 

"Thanks I'm glad I came too." He lied. She pulled him aside.

"So someone told me you came here with Kevin Price? Is that "true?"" She used air quotes on the last word. She seemed to do that a lot.

"Uh... Ya?" He said.

"How... "is that?"" She said. Connor laughed. 

"It's fine I guess?" He said, awkwardly brushing a piece of hair behind his ear. "He's a nice guy and we're friends." Connor didn't actually know if they were friends or not. Kimbe smiled brightly and nodded. Connor turned around and saw Kevin watching him from the house. "He checks up on me." He told her. She laughed.

"Hey! I just wanted to tell you that if it wasn't for the "Connor McKinley quo" I wouldn't be accepted at Pratt, and going on to fulfill my dream. You really "inspired me" and pushed me beyond my limits. So "thanks for that."" She said with a bright happy smile. Connor didn't really know how to respond. 

"No problem! You did the same for me!" He said with a smile, hoping she'd buy it. Her eyes went wide and she smiled brightly. 

"I did!?" He nodded enthusiastically. Connor said good bye and walked in the house to find a phone and call his dad. Two girls were chit-chatting near him and he dialed the number. He checked in with his dad and had a small conversation, letting him know that yes, he was ok and no, he wasn't bored. He hung up the phone and noticed the two girls were now looking at him strangely.

"You had to call your dad?" One of them said. She was wearing purple lipstick and a high ponytail and Connor thought she was very ugly.

"Ya?" He said. One of the girls looked shocked and the ugly one laughed.

"I would absolutely die!" The shocked one said. "Don't tell him anything!" 

"Not a word!" The ugly one added. Connor was confused and a little annoyed.

"I just come home crying, that usually gets him to leave me alone." One of them said. They chatted and Connor managed to slip away without them noticing.

~

Kevin sat in the living room with Naba and Arnold. Every now and then he would find Connor and make sure he was ok, but mostly he hung out with his friends. Nabalungi had a nice deep voice and she sang songs on her guitar for the room but then started making out with Arnold on the couch and that's when Kevin figured he should probably check up on Connor again.

He walked out to the front of the house on the lawn and was almost immediately stopped by a woman he had known as one of his guidance councilors.

"Kevin Price." She said with raised eyebrows and a small smile. "We need to talk." He groaned. "Don't give me that. Almost every single kid in this party has told me what they want to do, and you haven't so much as looked my direction." She pulled out a clipboard as a couple started screaming at each other, and then began making out. "Please, all I'm asking for is a signature and a college choice." Kevin awkwardly scratched his head. 

"I just... I don't know, I don't think I wanna go to college." He said.

"Trade school?" She asked. He shook his head. She pestered him more and more until he finally yelled an excuse about having to pee, retreating back into the house. He kept thinking about Connor and what he was up to and if he was having fun. He searched through the house to try to find him, and saw him standing being flirted with by a girl in the kitchen. She was all over him, and was playing with his hair. Kevin was disheartened for a second until Connor noticed him and mouthed 'save me' quite dramatically. Kevin laughed and walked over to them. He tapped the girl on the shoulder and realized just how drunk she was. She laughed at him and then sat on the floor and fell asleep. 

Connor tried not to laugh but he leaned in to Kevin's chest and giggled, watching her snore on the ground. Kevin felt warm and laughed along with him. They walked out to the back yard and watched as Chris ran out dressed in a chicken suit and screamed "SENIOR CLASS HAVE NO FEAR HOW ABOUT ANOTHER YEAR!" The party-goers screamed ferociously and ran to him ripping his feathers off and jumping up and down. Connor was practically in tears from laughing so hard, and Kevin yelled and cheered.

He and Connor hung out in the back and Kevin passed back the keys he had been holding to those who were fit to drive. The bag was empty and Chris came up to him.

"Well, that was great." He handed Kevin a well-deserved beer. "You two strapping young lads gonna stay and help me clean up?" 

"Fat chance Church." Kevin said. A young man ran from the house obviously drunk and tackled Kevin.

"Give me back my keys!" He screamed. Kevin wrestled him and held him in place.

"CHILL! YOU MUST CHILL!" He yelled. "I HAVE HIDDEN YOUR KEYS!" The boy looked at him with love in his eyes.

"I LOVE YOU MAN!" He screamed and hugged Kevin. 

"I love you too, go to sleep!" Kevin yelled back. The boy nodded fiercely and started to walk away, pointing toward the house. He passed out. Naba and Arnold came over to them from the house.

"We're headed out." Arnold said. 

"Stay safe guys." Kevin said handing Naba her keys. She smiled and hugged him warmly. 

"You know what Kevin? You're a great person." He smiled. "I'm a good person, but you're a great person." Connor watched them with an admiring look in his eyes.

"Stop, you're making me blush." Kevin said jokingly. Naba and Arnold waved good bye and left, clinging to each other. Kevin walked over to Chris, and tried his best to ignore Connor staring at him with that smile. "Well my friend, my job here is done." He turned his key bag upside down, and a set of keys fell out. Connor chuckled behind him and Kevin hung his head. Chris snapped his fingers.

"The guest bathroom." He said. 

Connor, Kevin and Chris all made their way back in to the house and to the bathroom near the end of the hall by the living room. Chris opened the door, and inside was a boy their age who was leaned over the toilet very drunk clutching a bottle of beer. He kept murmuring "I gotta go home I gotta go home." Chris shook his head.

"Poor guy." He said and handed Kevin his keys. "You're takin' him home." 

The car ride was long since this guy didn't know where his house was, so Connor and Kevin just kept asking him questions and driving around until he saw something familiar. 

"You guys are great, you guys are the bes-" he belched. Connor laughed so hard he cried a little. The guy in the back started laughing too, so hard that he almost threw up. Kevin kept driving, playing rock music from his radio. For a long time it was quiet, and Connor stared at the scenery from the window. He looked absolutely stunning in the night lights. Kevin had to remind himself to watch the road, and not Connor. 

They left the party around 1 a.m, but didn't find this guys house until around 6. When they did, he yelled loudly, "hey! That's my house! I live there!" He climbed over the seat and Connor to open the door and get out. He leaned down and said through the window, "You guys are pretty cool, if you wanna hang out anytime-" Kevin drove away.

~

Connor and Kevin walked together to Connor's house. Kevin parked his car at the gas station and said he'd rather walk because they had been sitting so long. Connor agreed. He took off his shoes, because they had been hurting him, and opted to walk bare-foot. 

They talked as they walked and Kevin said, "Woah watch out, there's some glass right there." He swept it away with his foot and Connor stared at him. 

"... Thank you." He said. Kevin smiled at him. His teeth were very white, and his smile was stunning. 

"No problem." Connor found that he was blushing as they walked down the street. They ended up talking about parent situations and he learned that Kevin lives with his sister, so Connor told his own story. 

"When I was thirteen they sat me down in a courtroom and actually made me choose! They made me choose between the two of them, so I picked my dad." He said. "I don't know it just... It felt safer that way." 

"That's great that you have such a good relationship with your dad y'know?" Kevin said. "I'm not very close with either of my parents." Connor walked on the little ledge next to the side walk, and Kevin held one of his hands to keep his balance. 

"I'm sorry. That sounds like it sucks." Connor said. Kevin laughed.

"It does kind of suck huh?" He said. They both laughed.

"Y'know, I really like you." Connor said. He felt Kevin tense up a little and his face got red. "You aren't like a lot of the people at our school. You're kinda bland but in a fun way." Connor realized this was probably not a good thing to say. Kevin helped him off the ledge.

"Thanks." He said. He was smiling brightly. "We should hang out again."

"I leave in sixteen weeks for school." Connor said.

"Sixteen weeks is a long time." Connor looked over and saw his house.

"This is me." He said. Kevin stood in front of him and they both shared eye contact that lasted a long time. Kevin was about to say something but Connor rushed forward and hugged him. It was awkward because their arms tangled a little bit, but it was nice none the less. Kevin held him tight and they were both a little resistant to let go. Connor laughed a little bit and handed Kevin the flower he had in his pocket. He waved before quickly running to his house.

He opened the door and walked in. His dad was sitting at his desk. "Hey dad!" He yelled. He spun around in his seat.

"How was it?" He asked with a smile. Connor turned to him, smile taking up his whole face.

"Dad... I'm so glad I went." He said. "Good night!" He ran to the stairs. 

"Wait wait wait!" His dad said, Connor walked back over to him.

"How was your friend... What was his name?"

"Kevin? He was great, super sweet." Connor tried not to blush. "But I think I ruined it... I called him bland, to his face." He said. His dad looked out the window.

"I don't think he's very upset." He said. Connor rushed over to the window and looked. Kevin was doing a little happy dance in the middle of the street and Connor laughed. "I'm glad you had fun." 

~

Naba, Arnold and John Michaels sat in Arnold's room hanging out. When Kevin wasn't around, John usually was. He and Kevin were kind of close but he had no idea about Kevin's little secret. Naba and Arnold decided to replace Connor's name with a girl name so they could talk freely about them without John getting any clues. 

"Y'know Kevin got invited over to Anna's house to meet her family." Naba said with a look to Arnold.

"Who's Anna?" He said. Naba threw her shoe at him and he fell back. "Oh yeah! Anna..." he said massaging his arm where the shoe had hit him. John looked intrigued by this conversation.

"Really? That's good for Kevin, I've never really seen him with a girl before." John said, messing around with Naba's guitar. Arnold laughed and Naba gave him a threatening look.

"It's good that she wants him to meet his- I mean her- parents." Arnold said.

"No!" Naba exclaimed. "Families are the kiss of death for Kevin! He's too awkward, he clams up!" Arnold turned this over in his head. 

"I don't know. If she really didn't like him she wouldn't be inviting him over to meet her folks. You don't do that until you know you want to be with someone." John said. Arnold and Naba exchanged knowing looks. 

"Ya..." Naba said. "I guess that is kinda true."

~

Kevin was in Connor's bedroom, and he was kinda freaking out about it. 

Connor was in his closet trying on different clothes for dinner. Kevin was looking around, trying to keep his cool as he pointedly ignored a naked Connor talking to him through the door. Kevin messed around with the knick-knacks on Connor's shelves. The closet door opened and a half naked Connor walked out holding two shirts. Kevin's breath caught.

"Do you like this one or this one?" He asked holding up both. Connor was stepping closer to him until they were practically chest to chest, and even though they were almost the same height, Kevin still had to look down at him. Kevin tried so hard not to look down too far or notice the underwear but it was really hard. Connor waited for a response and his eyes bore into Kevin's, and he couldn't look away. The tension was too thick so Kevin picked the blue shirt because it matched Connor's eyes, and Connor went back in the closet. Kevin sat on the bed and caught his breath. Half naked Connor was still the front image of his brain. He noticed a big dictionary by the bedside table.

"This is a monster dictionary." He said picking it up. Connor laughed from inside the closet, and yelled out,

"Ya, I used to do this thing where I would highlight and underline all the words I looked up. I stopped a few years ago though." Kevin flipped through the book. Almost every single word was highlighted and he got overwhelmed so he shut the book and quickly put it back. 

Connor came out of his closet in the blue shirt Kevin picked out. He walked over to him and did a little spin to show his whole outfit. Kevin was only a little ashamed to admit he mostly stared at his ass in those jeans but he couldn't help it. Connor looked wonderful and their eyes caught again.

He was getting mixed signals from Connor and he didn't know how to approach. Connor stepped closer to him and fixed a button on Kevin's shirt. His hands lingered on his chest just a moment too long. A strand of Connor's hair was hanging over his eyes so Kevin brushed it back. Connor looked up to him, and Kevin realized just how close they were. Connor's eyes were a very light blue and Kevin got a little dazed and was being drawn in by them. 

Connor must have realized two boys being this close wasn't normal, so he backed up a little, and his face went red. He was still smiling when he said, "dinner should be ready by now." He shyly led Kevin down the stairs to the dining room. Kevin checked out his butt.

They sat at the table. It was Connor, his dad, and two of his dads friends. Connor was passing out plates and his dad was telling the story of how Connor won that big scholarship, but how he doesn't want to fly. 

The older woman who was dressed to the nines, looked shocked and said, "you've never flown?" Connor laughed and scratched his head shyly.

"He almost did when he was eight-"

"Dad!" Connor exclaimed. His dad looked at him confused.

"What? It's a good story!"

"If you're gonna tell it, at least let me do it." Connor said, crossing his arms. Kevin thought Connor looked cute when he pouted. His dad chuckled.

"Fine, you tell it." His dad sat down. Connor stood a little straighter, and began his story.

"So, my dad had a business trip to Florida and he wanted me to come. Well, I was excited for the beach but I was scared about flying." He smiled when he said the next part and Kevin was engulfed in his story. "I thought that if there were babies on the plane, then it couldn't crash. But all the babies were crying, so I thought they knew something that I didn't!" Kevin laughed.

"When the plane started he screamed so loud. I had never heard anything like it, they had to turn the plane around and they kindly asked us to never fly Delta again." His dad said. Connor covered his face with his hands.

"I was scared!" 

"But turns out-"

"Dad!"

"Stop, this is the best part! Turns out there was a man on the plane who ran a recording studio. He gave me his card and asked if he could record Connor's scream." Connor laughed a little.

"So every now and then on a commercial, you can hear me scream." Kevin laughed along with the old couple. 

"So you never flew?" The old woman asked. Connor shook his head and sat down next to Kevin. Connor's dad passed around the food and they made idle chit-chat as they ate. 

"So Kevin, what are you planning to do now that you've graduated?" Connor's dad asked. Kevin was a little surprised he was being spoken too. 

"Well sir. I'm planning on spending as much time possible with your son." Connor hid his blush so no one could see. His dad laughed.

"I'm being serious, son." He said.

"So am I." Kevin responded. His dad rethought the question.

"What do you want to do though? Career-wise that is. Kevin thought.

"Well, my dad and mom are missionaries for the Mormon church so they're never really home. I was raised Mormon but I don't know, me and my sister haven't really ever felt connected to the religion. My brother Jack though, he's in Germany right now with them." The table was focused on him, and Connor looked really surprised. "I don't want to go into the Army because that scares me." He said and the older couple laughed. "I don't want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold or bought." He finished and the table looked utterly confused. "But right now I teach boxing, that new sport, down the lane from my house. I make pretty good money." 

Connor's dad nodded. They ate silently, and Connor's foot kept accidentally touching Kevin's. There was a knock at the door. Connor's dad got up and opened it. Two men in suits handed him a paper and one said, "Mr. McKinley, you have been served." Connor stood up quickly and rushed to him. 

"What's going on?" He said. 

"Your father has been violating his tax forms and stealing people's money for more than ten years. Your court date is on the paper sir." Connor looked like he had just been slapped.

"Please, I have guests over you cannot do things like this." His dad said. The two men left and Connor and his dad went in to the other room. After waiting for a while, Connor came out and apologized, and said it would probably be best for everyone to leave, but that he would call Kevin later.

~

Connor was out to breakfast with his mom and everything was getting so confusing. They were sat at a small table in a cafe and she was being herself which was infuriating.

"Mom. If they ask you questions, and they will ask you questions, please just try to make him look good." Connor pleaded.

"Sweet heart, you're asking me to help out the man who divorced me!" She said, crossing her legs. 

"Mom please." He said. 

"We never talk about you. Are there any girls in your life?" She asked. Connor thought of Kevin and wanted to rip his hair out.

"Mom I'm being serious." He said desperately. It was silent.

"I just..."she sighed. Don't understand why we can't talk about girls." Connor rolled his eyes. "Oh! There's my fella!" She said and got up from the table to kiss her new boyfriend. He was some sleezbag named Rick and he sat down at the table with a smile on his face and an arm around Connor's mom.

~

Connor and Kevin have been spending more and more time together. They have gotten closer than any friend Connor has ever had, and they see each other almost every day. He was just so nice and understanding, and when Connor needed someone to talk to he was always willing. When he needed a hug or to punch something Kevin always helped him out. He was so affectionate to Connor, and Connor appreciated it a lot, even if sometimes he was confused by just how affectionate Kevin got.

In truth, Connor couldn't deny that he was attracted to Kevin. He tried, oh how he tried to deny it, but Kevin always won over his affection. Sometimes Connor laid in his bed in the dark and wondered what it would be like to kiss Kevin, to touch him inappropriately, or even just to hold his hand. He thought about Kevin touching him in the dark, and kissing his neck and it excited him so much that he had to think about something else or take a cold shower.

Connor has never liked anyone before. 

He liked a boy once when he was in the fifth grade, but he was so young he didn't really understand what it meant. The only thing Connor knows is that he could never tell his dad. It would break his heart, his only son, liking other men and wanting to sleep with them. 

Connor knew he wasn't indiscreet. He knew he blushed around Kevin, or touched his hands and feet "on accident" too often. But he couldn't help it. He liked to pretend that Kevin felt the same way. Coming up with excuses in his brain to make it seem like they lived in a happy little bubble and could show as much affection as they wanted without being called a fag. But the thing was, sometimes Connor didn't need to pretend. Sometimes when it was late at night and they get back from a movie and Kevin looks at him like he wants to devour him right then and there, Connor doesn't have to make up excuses in his mind. He knows Kevin likes him. 

He and Kevin were at a burger joint drinking milkshakes. Connor was gloomy and Kevin was trying to cheer him up.

"I just... Feel bad." Connor said. Kevin raised an eyebrow.

"Of?" He asked.

"Being here?" Connor said. Kevin looked a little disheartened and Connor recovered. "Not that I don't wanna spend time with you, I do, it's just... With all the stuff that's happening with my dad and how I'm leaving soon I just feel like I should be spending more time with him. Which isn't your fault but it's how I'm feeling." They shared a look and Connor shrugged. Kevin grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the shop and to the car. They drove for a long time and talked about how they were feeling.

~

Today Kevin was going with Connor to the nursing home. He was a little frightened because old people freaked him out because of the way they ate, but he was excited none-the-less. They got out of his car and walked inside. Connor was wearing white pants and a yellow button up, and along with his red hair, Kevin thought he looked like sunshine. Connor grabbed his hand and smiled.

"C'mon, I want to introduce you to Miss Clara." He pulled him along the white hallways. "I told her about you." Connor said with a small smile. Kevin wanted so bad to believe that he was flirting with him. 

Miss Clara was a 97 year old almost-blind woman who smelled like baby wipes and wore black goggles to protect her eyes from the sun. She sat in her chair in the corner as Connor shut the door and closed the blinds so the only light was from her lamp. 

"Hello Miss Clara." Connor said, gently taking off her goggles. Her eyes adjusted to him, and she smiled. "I brought my friend Kevin." He said. She turned to Kevin. 

"Too tall." She said and motioned him down to her with her hand. Connor laughed and Kevin kneeled down next to her. She motioned Kevin closer. He leaned in and she whispered to him with a smile, "He likes you." Kevin looked to Connor with wide eyes. Connor was smiling, but not looking at him. In the dim light he could see a blush on Connor's cheeks.

~

Connor was making Kevin show the old people the movie they were going to watch. Kevin awkwardly walked up to the front of the room next to the tv. 

"Hello, uh, I'm Kevin Price. And um, today you guys are gonna watch this movie." He held up the VHS tape. "I forgot what it's called, but it's about a bunch of old people in space so... That should be fun." One of the old men stood up and made to leave, but Connor sat him back down.

"We're gonna have a good time and watch this movie Mr. Parks." He said. 

"Ok Connor." Mr. Parks responded, sitting in his seat. Kevin looked so uncomfortable all alone up there and Connor hid his laugh. 

"Ok... So now, uh, here's the movie." He popped the tape in and hit play. He slid past the senior citizens and stood next to Connor. He whispered into Connor's ear, "That was painful..."

Connor laughed and whispered back, "I thought it was cute." Kevin looked at him, cheeks going red. Connor smirked and turned his head to the movie. 

~

Later in the day, Kevin was going to teach Connor how to drive his car, since he doesn't know stick-shift. Kevin had driven himself and Connor to the nursing home, so they could practice in the circled parking lot. Kevin caught a glimpse of Connor's dad on their way out, and he gave Kevin the cold shoulder. 

Connor got in the front seat of the pink car, and Kevin directed him from the passengers side.

"Ok so now you're gonna hold the clutch and shift it to second gear." Kevin said. 

"Where's the clutch again?" Connor said with a laugh. Kevin laughed and pointed it out. They were both in hysterics as Connor nearly crashed the car several times into the hydrangeas. 

"Ok... Maybe I should drive." Kevin lamented. Connor caught his breath and nodded. "Here just switch seats with me." Kevin said undoing his seat belt. They clumsily tried to switch seats without getting out of the car. 

Kevin tried to scoot around Connor, and Connor went in front of him but slipped slightly, so Kevin caught him. Connor was practically in his lap, and threw his arms around his neck and laughed. Kevin couldn't help laughing either. They caught hold of each other's eyes and the laughing slowly subdued. Connor ran his hand through Kevin's hair with a small smile, and he felt shivers go down his spine. Kevin's eyes moved down to Connor's lips. They were pink and full and Kevin leaned in and kissed him. Connor was still and Kevin almost regretted his action until Connor practically threw himself at Kevin. Still in limbo between the car seats, Kevin wrapped his arms around Connor's smaller frame and pulled him in closer. Connor tilted his head and moved his lips against Kevin's so fiercely that Kevin thought he might pass out. Kevin licked Connor's lip, and Connor pushed into it.

"Wait wait." Kevin murmured, and tried to move his head away, but Connor followed, kissing him again. Kevin laughed slightly as he repositioned himself so he was back against the door with his legs draped over both the seats, and Connor straddled him, kissing him again, with a slight laugh too. They kissed for so long Kevin was surprised nobody saw them. Connor dragged his fingers through Kevin's hair and pulled slightly and Kevin made a really pathetic noise into Connor's mouth, which he was embarrassed by for two seconds until it made Connor kiss him harder and kind of grind into him. Even though Kevin's entire body was screaming for him to keep going, he knew it would probably be smarter to stop. 

He turned his head away from Connor, who proceeded to kiss at his ear, and that feeling went straight to Kevin's crotch. He laughed a little and pushed at Connor to make him stop. Connor laughed too.

"Sorry, I got a little carried away..." he said. His hair was messy. Kevin kissed him again.

"Let's get out of here." Kevin said. Connor nodded and awkwardly climbed off his lap and into his seat. Connor rested his hand on Kevin's thigh, and they laughed as they drove back to Connor's house.

It became clock-work. 

Every day they would see each other and find a place to hide and make out. For Kevin, years of pining and want all poured out, and for Connor, years of denial and loneliness. They ate each other up like two starving children shown a buffet. Kevin was completely at will for Connor, and Connor definitely took advantage of that. He would kiss him in risky places because he knew Kevin wouldn't deny him, the riskiest being his own house, in the kitchen with his dad in the living room. 

Kevin loved the way Connor made him feel. For once he felt good about himself, and genuinely happy. When Connor took him to his room and locked the door he felt death-defying. When he pushed him onto the bed and crawled onto his lap, he felt hot and bothered. And when he played with his ears with his teeth, Kevin felt like he had found heaven. It's like he had unlocked this whole side of Connor. This sexy, needy part of him that wasn't there before. He took-charge and knew what he wanted. And Kevin was oh-so turned on by it.

They went on a date to this burger joint and did everything regular couples do, except they didn't hold hands or kiss. Kevin wanted to so badly. He wanted to hold Connor up and scream that he had found him. He wanted to, but he couldn't. So, he was fine with the secret. They ate their dinner, and walked back out to Kevin's car. Connor was wearing a pastel pink shirt and blue jeans and Kevin wanted to kiss him so hard he bruised. He grabbed Connor and pulled him to the side of the building, pushing him up against the wall and kissing him. Connor laughed against his lips, but the laugh soon went away when Kevin started kissing down his jaw and neck. 

Connor stared at him in the dark. He looked right into his eyes, seemingly asking himself questions. He pulled Kevin's head down to him, and whispered in his ear, "Do you want to fuck me?" Kevin went hot. He looked shocked at Connor, who gave him a very plain face with the hint of a smirk. Kevin kissed him roughly. 

They drove to this little rocky area near the sea after they had stopped at the store to pick up supplies. Kevin parked his car, and he and Connor gave each other one last look. Asking with their eyes if they were sure. Connor climbed into the back seat and laid down, spreading his legs for Kevin to climb over him. They kissed and it was hot and Kevin had a boner, which pressed up against Connor, who grinded into it. 

They had sex. 

They had hot sex by the sea in the back of Kevin's car as the radio blasted. Kevin finished with a moan, and Connor looked tired. Kevin repositioned them, so he was next to Connor instead of on top of him. They were both drenched in sweat and naked under a thin blanket. Kevin kissed him. 

"You're shaking." Connor whispered. Kevin shook his head, mesmerized by his lips. "You're cold." Connor said. Kevin looked into his blue eyes and he felt whole.

"I think I'm just happy." He whispered. Connor kissed him.

"Here's some blanket." He said and hiked the blanket up. He rubbed Kevin's arm. Kevin tried to kiss him again, he wanted him so bad even though he knew he already had him. "Just listen to this song... This is great song." Connor whispered. 

They laid in Kevin's car and fell asleep listening the rock radio, drenched in sweat and still dirty from sex. They ignored how they felt because right now they had each other and that's all that really mattered anyway. They weren't lonely.

~

The next morning Kevin pulled up at Connor's house. Connor was slightly freaking out. Kevin looked around to make sure no one was outside watching, and he turned Connor's head and kissed him.

"You'll be ok." Kevin said holding Connor's cheeks. Connor looked into his eyes. Big and brown and full of love. He kissed Kevin again and again and one more time for good measure. Kevin unattached himself from Connor. "Ok you have to go inside now." He said, but he still looked as if he wanted Connor to do anything but follow the rules and go inside. 

"Ya probably." He said and kissed him long and hard once more. Connor gathered his things and stepped out of the car, walking up to the house. He waved goodbye to Kevin at the door, and he drove off, leaving Connor all alone.

He felt slightly ashamed about last night. He had thrown himself on Kevin and acted like a huge slut because he was horny. He was in a little bit of pain as well, which didn't help how he was feeling. He took a deep breath and opened the door. He stepped into the house wearing the same clothes as yesterday. It was quiet, and he figured his dad must be asleep. He crept forward a few feet, inching closer to the stairs.

"Good morning." He heard from the den. Shit. He sighed and looked over to his dad, who was sitting at his desk. "Dad, I can explain-"

"I don't think I want to hear it!" He yelled. He got out of his chair and walked over to Connor. He was red with anger. "Do you know how worried I was Connor?! Do you think I was having a good time last night, having the police search for you at two in the morning!"

"Dad I-"

"Where were you!" He yelled loudly. This was so scary, he had never heard his dad yell like this before. Connor's stomach dropped and his hands started to shake. He avoided eye contact with his dad.

"Uh... I, um." He rambled. His dad grew more and more angry. Connor finally looked to him, and shook his head sadly.

"Were you with him?" His dad asked. Connor looked up to his eyes, scared. He didn't know if he knew how he was with him.

"Um, no I wa-" 

"Don't lie to me Connor." He said crossing his arms. Connor looked to his feet.

"... I'm sorry." He said quietly.

"Why didn't you call me!? You always call me!" He yelled. 

"I'm sorry!" Connor yelled back. 

"What were you two doing?" He asked looking Connor straight in the eye. Connor couldn't feel his legs. Oh god, he knew. He probably knew all about what he did.

"... Nothing." He lied. 

"Connor I see the way he looks at you! I see the way you act around him! Do you think I'm stupid? Do you think I'm blind to what is happening!?" He yelled, walking toward Connor. Connor was shaking and murmuring and stumbling back until he hit the wall. "Please I just need to know what you two were doing last night." He pleaded. Connor started crying.

"... I'm sorry..." he whispered trying to wipe his tears away. His dads eyes went wide. 

"Did you... Did you two?.." he asked cautiously, backing away from Connor. Connor couldn't look at him. "Connor answer me." He said sternly. Connor let himself calm down for a minute before answering.

"Yes." He said quietly. It was silent.

"Jesus." His dad breathed. It was deathly silent, and Connor wanted to walk out so bad. His dad walked over to a chair and sat down. He pulled out the chair in front of him and told Connor to sit down. Connor slowly made his way over and sat in front of his dad. He had never been more uncomfortable and ashamed in his life. They sat quietly, his dad taking in all of this information. Every second dragged on until minutes past, and it felt like an hour until finally, he talked. "How long have you been seeing him?" Connor sighed.

"For a few weeks." Connor said. He felt tired. His dad made another strangled noise, and shook his head. 

"How did it happen last night." His dad said. Connor looked at his feet as he told the story. 

"Well, we went to that burger place by the church, and it was late and at the end of the night he had that look in his eye, y'know that look?" He asked. His dad nodded. "Well we talked about it and at first I was hesitant." His dads head lifted. "But then I attacked him anyway." He laughed a little and his dads face went solid. Connor figures if he doesn't laugh, he'll cry, so it's better to just do what he wanted. His dad was quiet for a long time before finally he asked,

"Was he rough with you?"

"Dad, no." Connor said. "He was really sweet and gentle." He thought of Kevin and the sea and sweat and his heart raced slightly. "Y'know, it actually feels good to talk about this with you. I feel like I've been hiding something big from you for so long, and I hated it. It's been eating away at me and I feel twenty pounds lighter now that you know." He actually smiled genuinely. His dad looked at him, and sighed.

"How long have you known." His dad asked with a serious face. Connor was confused.

"Known what?" He asked.

"Known that you're?.." he trailed off. Connor blushed deeply.

"Oh..." he said and awkwardly scratched his arm. "To be honest, I didn't really know until Kevin showed up was interested in me. But then, once I figured it out, it was like all of the sudden my whole world changed... Dad, when me and Kevin first spent time together, he pointedness out some glass for me to walk around... No one has ever looked after me like that." His dad was quiet for a while until he finally spoke,

"Connor, I'm definitely not happy that you're..." he was thinking of how to phrase this next sentence and Connor got nervous. "With this boy. But if that's what you do I'm not going to shame you for it, but you need to be honest with me from now on. I don't like that that you started keeping secrets." He said. Connor nodded. He still felt a little ashamed about lying but at least now they thy knew everything about each other. 

"Sorry dad." Connor said, pulling on his shirt. 

"It's ok." They hugged. "I love you Connor." He said.

"I love you too."

~

Kevin was at Arnold's house with him and Nabalungi. He was walking around holding a letter he had written to Connor. 

"What are you smiling about?" Naba said, playing some strings on her guitar. Kevin chuckled.

"Nothing." He said. She looked at him, and then to the letter, and then to him again. She had a confused face, and then suddenly her eyes went wide and her mouth dropped as she pointed to Kevin.

"You had sex!" She yelled. Kevin went red and Arnold sat up straight.

"You had sex?!" He screeched. Kevin was very red and he shoved the letter in his pocket. 

"Shut up." He said, scratching his head. 

"Kevin, this is like... A super big deal!" She exclaimed, sitting up from her bean bag on the floor. 

"It's not that big a deal!" He said. "Is it?" 

She made a noise with her throat. "Uh? Yeah?" She said dumbly. Arnold nodded.

"Especially in um... Your situation, this is kind of a pretty big deal buddy." He said. Kevin leaned against the wardrobe behind him. 

"Kevin, think of it this way." She repositioned herself on the bean bag and put her guitar down beside her. "You two had sex. That will never never, in a million years! Leave your brain." She said. Kevin rolled his eyes. He was about to say something but she cut him off. "You two could break up and never see each other again for your entire lives, but one day you would pass each other on the street, and you would remember that you had sex with him." 

"How does that even work?" Arnold asked. Kevin went very red and hid his face as Naba hit Arnold with a hairbrush and told him to shut up. 

"This is a mega deal Kev." She said. Kevin looked to her and couldn't help the small smile that crept up on his face. She smiled at him, and then Arnold smiled too. They all laughed together.

~

"I think Kevin is going to tell Anna he loves him- her!" Arnold said, quickly recovering from his mistake. Him and Naba were hanging out with John Michaels again today. Arnold didn't particularly like the guy, but he was entertaining to say the least. "He showed me this letter." Arnold said, pulling out the letter Kevin wrote and left at his house. Nabalungi sprung forward and grabbed at it.

"He's going to tell her he loves her?!" She said sharply with surprise and worry in her eyes. Arnold nodded. John shrugged.

"I don't know this girl, but she seems great from what you guys have been saying about her." John said from the sofa. "Does she love him?" He asked. Arnold and Naba looked at each other, both asking the same question with their minds.

"I think she does..." Arnold said.

"I'm not so sure." Naba said. "She hasn't had a lot of... Experience with men and Kevin was probably her first, and she's leaving so soon..." Naba stared at the un-opened letter. "I don't know, I just don't want Kevin to get hurt." She said. Arnold snatched the paper up.

"Well maybe-" he said.

"She might just be using him!" Naba said.

"I don't think-"

"She might be using him to get it all out of her system you know?"

"I really think tha-"

"She's just so? Preppy-"

"Will you let me talk?!" Arnold yelled. Naba glared at him. 

"Fine. Sorry, talk." She said crossing her arms.

"Thank you." He said. "Think about it. If she didn't love him, she wouldn't be spending so much time with him and not her dad, or kissing him all the time even in public where she knows they might get caught." John looked a little confused. "I think if she was just leading him on, she wouldn't have had sex with him." Arnold said. Naba stared at him, then quickly snatched the letter back. She opened it and read it out loud.

He had written Connor a poem about how much he loved him but never had the nerve to say it. Naba put the letter down and looked at Arnold and John. John had a happy smile on his face.

"I think that's love." He said. Arnold and Naba smiled.

"Love." They agreed.

~

Connor and Kevin have been going out for a while, and Connor leaves for England soon. In three weeks soon. He can feel himself growing ever distant to Kevin, and Kevin getting more and more anxious about something. It was stressing him out, and with everything that was going on with his dad and the police investigations, he just didn't know if he and Kevin were going to survive.

Connor refused to believe that his dad was guilty and stealing people's money. He just wouldn't do that.

Connor was washing dishes in the nursing home kitchen with his dad. 

"I just... Don't know if I should stay with Kevin." He said. He knew his dad was uncomfortable about the topic but he didn't really care. 

"Well, you do leave soon." He said putting a plate away. "Did he do something?" He asked.

"No! He's been great but, with everything that's going on, I don't know I just don't see it working out." Connor said.

"So break up with him." His dad said. 

"But I can't do that." Connor said. His dad rolled his eyes.

"Why? It's like you said, it's not going anywhere." He abandoned the dishes and turned to Connor.

"I know but I just don't think I can..." Connor said.

"Do you love him." He asked.

"No..." he blushed deeply. His dad turned back to the dishes.

"Then break it off. Better to do it now than later." He said.

"But dad what if we-"

"Connor don't break the boys heart-"

"Dad I love him." Connor said. His dad turned to him. They were silent and his dad thought something over. He walked over to the counter and opened a drawer, grabbing a pen.

"Here give him this." He said, handing the pen to Connor.

"Dad I'm not going to give him a pen." He said blandly. His dad raised his hands in defense. 

"Better than nothing." he said. 

Connor put the pen in his pocket.

~

Later on in the day Connor was in the car with Kevin, driving back from a date. They stopped at a red light. They were talking about everything and nothing at all. Connor could feel the pen in his pocket like a hot iron on his leg.

"So I said to Arnold that it was actually Darth Vader that-"

"Kevin can we talk." Connor said, finally getting the nerve to speak up. Kevin turned to him, but also kept his eyes on the road. He draped and arm over his shoulder and ran his fingers through Connor's hair. He tried to ignore how good it felt. 

"Ya what's up?" He asked. Connor's stomach dipped. This was a lot harder to do then he expected. 

"Well we've been together for a while." He said. Kevin nodded happily. 

"I wanted to tell you something too." Kevin said, pulling out a piece of folded paper from his pocket. He handed it to Connor. It said his name and had a heart. He read the first few lines and stopped.

"Kevin I don't think we should say that yet." Connor said.

"Say what?" He said with a playful smile. Connor was not feeling very playful. He felt like his stomach was churning with how anxious he was.

"Kevin please-"

"I just wanted to say-"

"Kevin."

"I love you." He said. Connor stared ahead to the road. "I said it." 

"Yeah." He said. "You did." 

Kevin had a smile you would see on a small child, and Connor didn't understand how he was feeling so good.

"We've been spending a lot of... time, together and I think we should probably start spending some time... apart." He said hoping to God Kevin didn't break down. Kevin smiled.

"Sure." He said happily. They drove on and Connor's face grew ever redder until Kevin finally realized. He pulled over the car on a curb and parked, looking over to Connor confusedly. "Wait... How?" He said.

"Well... as friends." Connor said. Kevin nodded but still had a confused look on his face.

"Are you?" He asked, realization donning. "Are you breaking up with me?" He asked.

Connor rushed for an answer. "No, I'm just suggesting that we spend less time together... And as friends." He said.

"Did I do something?" Kevin asked. Connor groaned.

"No, Kevin you didn't do anything but this stuff with my dad hasn't gone away and I leave so soon I think we should not be.. "together anymore"" he air quoted the lasted words.

"What do you mean?! You're talking like that girl Kimbe!" He said, holding Connor's hands so he couldn't quote. Connor didn't know what to say. "You don't like me anymore?" He asked with hurt in his eyes and voice. Connor's heart broke.

"No! Kevin... we shared the most intimate thing two people can share." He said, remembering their night by the sea. 

"So what now that you have me you don't want me?" He said. 

"No Kevin! When I told my dad about that night-"

"You told your dad!" He exclaimed, slapping his hands to his face. 

"What! You have Arnold and Naba and I have my dad!" He said. Kevin refused to look at him. "... Did you tell them?" He asked, feeling ashamed.

"Yes." Kevin said. "Are you mad about that?"

"No that's fine." Connor said sarcastically. "I mean they'll just tell everybody but it's fine." He said and stared out the other window. 

"I can't believe you told your dad." He said. Connor groaned. He pulled out the pen. 

"Here take this." He said handing it to Kevin, who stared at it blankly. "Write me." He said.

Kevin looked at Connor like he was an idiot. He took the pen. "I can't believe this..." he said looking at the road ahead of them. "You just broke up with me."

"I have to go." Connor said and opened the car door and ran. 

Connor made it back home and couldn't gather the courage to go in his house. He sat in his own car. It was quiet and he saw Kevin's face. He cried. He leant his head down on the wheel and sobbed.

~

Jim was thrilled when Connor told him that they had broken up. 

He didn't like Kevin from the get-go and learning of their "forbidden relationship" only made him dislike him more. He had come to terms with his son being this way, honestly he had kind of expected it, but it did take him a while to cope with it. 

As a surprise for Connor, Jim decided to get him a set of nice luggage for his journey to England. Sort of a last hurrah for him to praise his son. He sang along to the music on his radio as he drove. He smiled as he entered the travel store and picked out the nicest set he could find.

As he rang it up with the cashier who looked about his age, he did his best to flirt with her. They made flirtatious small talk and he said,

"So would like to go out for dinner som-"

"Oh I'm sorry sir, but your card has been declined." She said taking his debit card from the machine. His palms started to sweat.

"Well, that's alright I'll just take it back-"

"Actually its policy for me to confiscate declined cards..." she said sadly. He backed away from the counter. "I could put these bags on hold for you if you'd like?" She said grabbing a bag.

"No no... that's ok." He said and quickly exited the store. 

As he drove home he played no music, and quickly parked his car at his house. He was so nervous he didn't know what to do. He went quietly to the bathroom and locked the door. He sat in the tub and cried. After about ten minutes Connor knocked on the door.

"Dad?" He asked. "Are you ok?" Jim mustered his best voice.

"Yes! I'll be out in a minute." He yelled back to him.

~

Kevin didn't know what to do with himself. He was never home, he didn't talk to his friends, and he drove around late at night, trying to figure out where it all went wrong. He kept thinking of his letter to Connor that Connor still had but hasn't read. He wanted to confront Connor, take his letter back and burn it. He couldn't stand knowing it was still out there, unread.

It was late, and Arnold had gone on a vacation with his family. Kevin was making tapes to send him. 

"I'm passing the mall where we first met." He said into the small tape. "I wish I hadn't gone there that day." He started to tear up. "Oh! And there's the street where he dumped me..." he blinked his eyes and put the tape away. After a few hours of driving around it began raining. He stopped his car by a telephone booth, and walked through the rain to it. He called his sister.

"Hey, it's me." He said when she picked up. Kevin felt drained and cold as he stood in the rain. 

"Kevin baby, just come home. Why don't you just come home." She said. Kevin leaned against the wall.

"No I.... he gave me a pen..." he said. "I gave him my heart and he gave me.. a pen." Tears rolled down his face along with the rain. His sister sighed over the phone. 

"Kevin if you want to come home at any time the key is under the mat ok?" She said. 

"Yeah... ok." He hung up the phone. Kevin got back in his car and saw the pen sitting in his passenger seat. He imagined Connor sitting next to him, touching him and laughing and kissing him. He imagined Connor whispering dirty things in his ear and grinding on him, and sweating next to the sea. Kevin leaned his head down and cried hard into his hands as he thought about Connor and how much he missed him and wanted to kiss him and hold him. Kevin waited so long and he finally got what he wanted and then it was taken away from him. 

Everything reminded him of Connor. He couldn't take it, he started the car and drove off. He ended up at a gas station and found a few of the guys he knew from school hanging out drinking beer in the parking lot. He parked his car and went out to talk to them.

"Kevin!" This guy Gerald Schrader said happily. The other boys yelled and clapped. 

"Dude! Where have you been!" Marcus Neeley exclaimed. They were leaned up against a metal fence. 

"Johnny told us you've been seein' some girl!" Colton Davis said. Kevin's face twisted in confusion, then he realized Arnold must have told them he was dating some girl. "Her name is Anna right?" He asked.

"Uh, yeah." He said. "We broke up though." He said sadly.

"Who left who man?" Adrian Zelder said sipping his beer. Kevin glared at him.

"... She left me." He said. There was an immediate explosion of words from the boys.

"Bogus man!"

"Bitches dude." 

"I hate when bitches do that man!" They we're going crazy. Neeley came up to him and threw an arm around his shoulder. 

"Kevin man," he said. "I can get you any girl you want." He was hanging on Kevin.

"Were lady experts man." Zelder said drunkly. The other boys laughed and made various noises. 

"I don't want another girl. I want Con-Anna!" He said. 

"Why man she sounds like she's bad!" Davis exclaimed, the other boys agreed loudly.

"Because man... When I was with her, I felt good about myself. I was walking around feeling satisfied.. Can you imagine that?" He was silent. "I really loved her..." he said quietly. The boys Were quiet for once, neither of them knew what to say.

Finally Neeley spoke up. "I loved a girl once... She hurt me real bad." His face went gloomy. "I never wanna go through that again. It was silent. Schrader punched the fence.

"You're bringin' me down man!" He yelled. The boys all yelled and hit Neeley. 

"Listen Kev," Zelder said. "we can get you any girl you want man."

"If you guys are experts on ladies, then why are you out here in the middle of the night on a Saturday drinking beers by yourself, no ladies anywhere." Kevin said. They were quiet for a second.

"By choice man!" Neeley yelled. The boys went crazy again.

"Conscious choice!" 

"Listen guys I don't have to listen to this." He started to walk away.

"Kevin man c'mon." Zelder grabbed him. Kevin grabbed his beer and threw it against the fence, the boys screamed.

"YOU'RE WIGGIN' MAN!" They yelled at him. The boys drunkenly started singing about Kevin wigging out. He rolled his eyes. Zelder poked his chest.

"Stop Kevin I can get you any girl you want-"

"Then get me Anna!" He yelled.

"I can't do that man!" He yelled back. Kevin glared at him as the boys still danced and shouted and he walked back to his car and drove off.

~

It was late in the afternoon and Connor was depressed in his bed. He laid there, staring at the ceiling and thinking about Kevin. 

Suddenly he heard music. He heard music that had played when he and Kevin spent the night in his car by the sea. Connor ran to the window. 

Kevin was standing in the slight rain of the summer, holding a boom box over his head. Connor stared at him and then walked back to bed and cried. He cried for hours and hours. The pit in his stomach swallowed him whole and he cried harder.

~

Kevin called the house at least four times a day just hoping that maybe Connor would answer. 

He never did.

Connor was standing by his dining room table with his dad as his dad went through his files. The phone rang, and his dad glared at it.

"Should I pick it up..." Connor asked.

"Do you want to pick it up?" His dad asked.

"No." Connor said. "I know if I pick it up we'll only get back together." 

"Then don't pick it up." His dad said. The phone stopped ringing and he heard Kevin's voice leaving a message.

"Hey Connor... Its me uh... This is the last time I'm going to call. But before I stop, can you do me a favor?" Connor stepped toward the phone. "That letter I gave you? Can you burn it? Or rip it up, or throw it away... it makes me sick to know that it's still out there... ok bye." Connor rushed forward and picked up the phone.

"Kevin!" He said. The line was dead. He put the phone down. Connor stared at it for a long time hoping that it would ring again. Just once, he hoped. If it rang one more time he could pick it up and maybe he'd be able to kiss Kevin again. 

He probably wouldn't have picked it up if it rang again though.

~

The next day Connor dressed in a nice suit and visited the police department. He waited for forty-five minutes before he was spoken too by one of the policemen from the day before, along with the case manager.

"You have to believe me when I say, that my dad would never steal dead people's money." Connor said, trying to hide his many emotions. "He just... He doesn't have to! We have enough money." Connor said.

"Listen son, we know you're upset." The case manager said. "But we believe that your father had been taking his residents money after they have passed, writing them off in his tax returns." 

"He wouldn't do that!" Connor exclaimed. The men sighed. 

"Does he ever buy you expensive items?" Connor thought of his car. "Does he have expensive furniture and decorations covering the house?" Connor thought of his paintings and the furniture and grew more nervous. "Does he buy very expensive gifts?" He asked. The watch on Connor's wrist burned. "When you go home, look for things like that. We believe he has hidden a stash of money somewhere in the house but we haven't been able to file for a search warrant yet. Go home and look. If you find anything, come to us immediately." He said. Connor sat in his seat a little straighter.

"You know what I realized." He said. "I woke up today and made myself look presentable and nice, and for what? For a couple of guys to tell me my father is a criminal?" Connor felt sick. "I'm going home." He said and left the room.

When Connor got home, his dad wasn't there. He looked around at all of the very expensive things in his house and started to panic. Connor frantically ran to his dads room and rummaged through his items. He found no cash. He ran to his office. Nothing. He took a big breath. "They made me doubt you..." he said quietly to himself. He stood up and walked to the living room. He saw a small decorative box near the piano. He shook his head at himself, cursing his anxiousness. He opened the box. Inside was hundreds of bills, ranging from one to one hundred. Connor stared at the money. "... No..." he whispered. He frantically ran out of the house and to his car, and drove to the home.

His father was helping feed an old woman with no teeth, and sweetly wiped the excess from her mouth. 

"Dad come here we need to talk right now." Connor said. His dad turned to him with a smile which vanished when he saw his face. He followed Connor to the Home kitchen and Connor shut the doors. "Dad. Please tell me the truth. Did you steal from these people?" Connor asked. His dad scoffed.

"Connor of course not!" He said with a smile. Connor sighed.

"Dad..." he said sadly. "I found the money." His dads face dropped. "Why did you lie to me?"

"I got that money for you Connor." He said.

"You're a criminal."

"I got it for you! So you would never have to depend on anyone!"

"You're a thief!" Connor raised his voice.

"I HELP THESE PEOPLE!" His dad yelled. "I take better care of them then their families do! I wipe their mouths and help them use the bathroom!"

"You stole from them!"

"I MAKE THEIR LIVES BETTER!" He yelled. Connor glared at his dad and began to weep.

"You're a thief." He said and left the room, leaving his dad alone.

The next day Connor was at the nursing home when two police men came and arrested his father. Connor cried and his father yelled and the old retirees had to be calmed down.

~

Kevin was training. He boxed another man in the ring. He was lean and fit and as Kevin punched him mercilessly he imagined if he had been with this man instead of Connor, and if he would be hurting this much. He was handsome and strong and muscular. Kevin was by no means not attracted to him. But it seemed that he couldn't see anyone but Connor in every man he looked at. He punched a little bit harder. 

"Kev! You got a visiter!" Someone yelled from the door of the gym. Kevin looked over and saw Connor standing in the same pink shirt he wore when they had sex. 

Kevin got punched in the face. 

Connor rushed over to him but the other man held him back as they examined Kevin's nose. Kevin laid on the floor, his nose crooked in front of him. His trainer climbed over him and put his hands on either side of his nose.

"This is gonna hurt." He said with a slight smile. He jerked his hands and popped Kevin's nose back in place and Kevin yelled from the pain. His nose throbbed, and he held a tissue up to it to stop the bleeding. Connor looked at him, frightened. Kevin threw him a distant look and walked over to his locker, tissue still held to nose. Connor followed him.

"Kevin I have to talk to you." He said. Kevin refused to look back at Connor. "Kevin please! Can we talk in private?" He asked. Kevin shook his head. Connor grabbed his hand and pulled him around the corner of the gym into an empty hallway were he cornered Kevin against a wall. "Look at me." Connor said desperately. Kevin avoided his eyes even though he desperately wanted to look. Connor pressed his body to Kevin's and Kevin pressed his further into the wall. "Kevin please look at me." He still didn't look. "... I love you." He said. Kevin looked. Connor was almost crying. "I love you." He whispered.

"No you don't." Kevin said sadly. "You're only using me cuz your dad is messed up." Connor shook his head and cupped Kevin's cheeks in his hands. "And your lonely." He said trying his hardest not to jump Connor. 

"No no..." he said desperately. "Please... I love you." He kissed Kevin, who did not kiss back. Kevin felt like his body was about to kill itself. He wanted this again, so bad, but he refused to get hurt. "I need you." He whispered. He kissed him again slowly. Kevin tried to resist. "Please." He kissed again and Kevin came undone. He grabbed Connor's head and pulled their mouths together, kissing him so hard he thought he might break his nose again.

~

Connor woke up the next day naked in Kevin's bed. He tried to get up but Kevin wrapped an arm around him and pulled him closer. He smelled like sweat and fabric softener. 

"Just sleep." He whispered and lightly kissed Connor's neck where a hickey had formed from the previous night.

~

Kevin and Connor visited the jail yard where his dad was. Kevin was sitting with Connor's dad on the lunch tables they kept outside. He refused to make eye contact with Kevin.

"How have you been holding up?" Kevin asked. 

"Fine." He answered shortly. Kevin was silent.

"I don't know if Connor told you or not but... we're back together." He said. He looked at Kevin with a sour emotion covering his face.

"Do you really think this little phase Connor is going through will last?" He asked. Kevin quirked an offended eyebrow. "You came to him out of nowhere, new and surprising. Eventually that'll ware off." He said. 

"Don't be so sure about that." Kevin said. "He's taking me to England with him." He stood up to walk away, deciding he had been humiliated enough. 

"Wait!" His dad called. Kevin turned. "Did he... he sent you here right?" He asked shyly. Kevin sat back down.

"He wanted me to give you this." Kevin pulled out a letter from his pocket. He handed it to Connor's dad, who tore into it like a child on Christmas morning. He read over it and sighed, placing it back on the table.

"He's never going to forgive me." He said somberly. Kevin felt bad. He sat back down at the table and tried his best to cheer him up.

"Did he sign it I still love you? There was a version he wrote that he said he still loved you." Kevin said, remembering Connor writing at least five different letters with Kevin on his bed before finally deciding on this one. Connor's dad reopened the letter and looked through the end. He put it down sadly again.

"Nothing..." he said. Connor leaned forward and pat his back reassuringly. 

"Hey, just know that there is a version out there that ends like that..." he said. Connor's dad didn't respond. "That's gotta count for something right?" He said. 

"I don't think he will ever get over this." His dad morbidly said. 

All the sudden Connor appeared in the distance, walking up to the pair of them. He was quiet and held himself with dignity. He wore a pale yellow sweater and Kevin thought he looked absolutely adorable with his red hair. 

"Hi dad." He said. Kevin watched from a distance, giving them space and time to talk through everything. After ten minutes they finally hugged, and Connor handed his dad a pen. "Write me." He said.

Kevin cackled.

~

Connor and Kevin were finally on the plane to England. Kevin was sitting next to Connor, their clasped hands hidden between themselves. Connor was freaking out and Kevin tried his best to calm him as the plane began to roll.

"Do want something?" Kevin asked. "Magazine, book, headset?" Connor shook his head. He stared at Kevin determinedly and looked around at the very crowded plane. A baby cried loudly as Connor leaned forward and kissed Kevin. The old woman next to them either didn't notice or care, Kevin thought it was probably the latter.

"I love you." Connor said staring Kevin directly in the eyes. His hand squeezed harder on Kevin's and Kevin laughed.

"I love you too." He said back, kissing Connor again. This time the woman noticed and she pointedly ignored them. 

As the plane ascended Connor glued himself to Kevin side and held on tight.

"Look at that no smoking sign." Kevin said pointing to the small red cigarette shaped sign by the reading light. "When that sign lights up and dings, we will know we are in the clear. 90% of all crashes happen at take off." Connor nodded and they decided to watch the sign together. Kevin stroked Connor's arm. The plane climbed higher and higher and Connor grew more nervous. "Any second now." Kevin would mutter.

"It's gonna ding?" Connor asked. 

"Ya any second now..." they sat in silence. Minutes turned to hours which turned to years until finally,

*ding*

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading!! I feel like it's been forever since I posted a story and I'm glad it was this one!! Leave a comment!!


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